The Onion, dead on:
I may be a Christian, but it’s not like I’m one of those wacko "love your neighbor as yourself " types.
I’m here to tell you there are lots of Christians who aren’t anything like the preconceived notions you may have. We’re not all into "turning the other cheek." We don’t spend our days committing random acts of kindness for no credit.
But that doesn’t mean I think people should, like, forgive the sins of those who trespass against them or anything weird like that.
We’re not all "Jesus Freaks" who run around screaming about how everyone should "Judge not lest ye be judged," whine "Blessed are the meek" all the time, or drone on and on about how we’re all equal in the eyes of God!